


Memories

by CptScarlett



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Romance, Temporary Amnesia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-28
Updated: 2020-08-27
Packaged: 2021-03-07 03:21:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 13,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26150104
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CptScarlett/pseuds/CptScarlett
Summary: Valerie Maynard still recalled the first time she met Leonard McCoy--she'd found humor in his snarky remarks to Jim Kirk about his divorce as they traveled on the Cadet Shuttle. She secretly had a crush on him from afar, though never speaking to him, at the Academy. Now she's been assigned to the Enterprise and finally gets a real introduction to McCoy. Can the connection they both feel withstand her suddenly memory loss after an away mission accident?
Relationships: Leonard "Bones" McCoy/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 16





	1. How it all started...

**Author's Note:**

> I'm quite nervous as this is the first time I've posted in quite some time, and it's my first Star Trek fic! (You'll find my Doctor Who and Doctor Strange fic if you check out my other works--and I just realized I guess I have a thing for Doctor's! lol) I skipped over a bit of time in the story, but I wanted to get to the 'good parts'. I hope you enjoy. Leave me some feedback and kudos!
> 
> (P.S. These characters, other than the original ones, aren't mine, but boy wouldn't it be fun if they were!)

Valerie Maynard supposed her journey with Leonard McCoy had begun with those first words she clearly heard from his mouth. "Yeah. Well, I got nowhere else to go, the ex-wife took the whole damn planet in the divorce. All I got left is my bones.”

She knew he’d been speaking before that, but she had been ignoring his argument, and then he was having a private, if not loud, conversation with another new recruit. For some reason, though, her attention had focused in on them when he spoke those words.

She didn’t mean to snort-laugh so loudly, but something about his comment struck her funny—he heard her and looked across the aisle at her with a raised eyebrow. She raised her hands up in a placating gesture. “Sorry, sorry.”

They were the first, and only words she’d said to Leonard McCoy on that flight, and during their entire Academy career. She’d seen him hanging around with Jim Kirk, the recruit he’d been talking to, quite frequently, but since she was on the engineering track while he was on Medical and Kirk in Command, they hadn’t actually ran into each other to have the opportunity to speak. She found him attractive, and from what she’d seen of his grumpy personality, she found it endearing. Something which her friends who were in the medical program thought was bonkers, as they’d spent time with the man and found him frustratingly pessimistic.

In the rush after the initial incursion with Nero, Val had been posted on a different ship. But when her ship was irreparably damaged, she had been reassigned to the Enterprise. It wasn’t till days after receiving her orders that she realized she’d inevitably be faced with Leonard McCoy again.

She had been sitting in her quarters at Starfleet headquarters where she’d been temporarily assigned till her new orders came in. A chime at the computer station on her desk alerted her to an incoming video call. She went over and smiled when she saw who the call was from. She tapped a button to accept the incoming transmission.

“Nyota! What’s up, girl!”

“I called as soon as I could! Did you get your orders?” Her best friend from academy piped up excitedly.

Valerie smirked and shrugged. “Maybe,” she drawled out.

“Val! Don’t mess with me? Did you or did you not get your orders? They were supposed to come through days ago!”

This time, she grinned and nodded excitedly. “I did! I’m on the Enterprise!”

“Yes! I knew it! You were one of the best engineers in your class! It’s about time they got you on the best ship!”

“As soon as you make it back to Earth, I’m to report to Commander Scott.”

Uhura grinned and leaned into towards the screen, as if someone could hear her even though she was in her quarters. “And eventually you’re going to have to report to sickbay and receive a full and thorough examination by Doctor McCoy.” She waggled her eyebrows.

Valerie rolled her eyes, but the blush that rose in her cheek instantaneously revealed her true thoughts on the matter. “Nyota! Stop it! You know he won’t remember me, and besides, it’s been ages, who’s to say I still have a crush on him?”

“Maybe the red in your cheeks? Or the way you won’t look me in the eye?”

“Okay, listen—I won’t deny that I’m intrigued. That I look forward to finally _actually_ meeting the Doctor, and maybe getting to know him. Maybe we’ll become friends. But I’m not pushing my luck hoping for anything more. Besides, he probably has someone he’s interested in on the ship already.”

“He doesn’t,” Uhura shook her head.

“How do you know?”

“Because it’s my job to know! I may or may not have asked a couple of the nurses and they say he’s too busy with work and trying to keep Jim in line to have a love interest.”

“I can see how those two things _would_ lead to a pretty full schedule.”

“He’ll learn to make time for other things once he meets you and sees how amazing you are, Val.”

Valerie gave her best friend a sweet smile. “Thanks Ny, but like I said, I’m not getting my hopes up. I’m just so excited to be able to serve on the Enterprise. When will you guys be coming back around to Earth?”

“We’re headed back that way now, in fact! We just finished this insane mission—it was supposed to be a run of the mill observation of a planet—but nothing is ever run-of-the-mill with the Enterprise, especially not with Jim Kirk in command. He, Bones, and Spock all three about got themselves killed. But they’re all safe, thankfully.”

“And, how is your favorite Vulcan doing?”

Uhura smiled and even with her dark skin, Valerie caught glimpse of her own blushing. “He’s fine. I’m glad he’s alive. But—I just wish he wouldn’t be so willing to die. It’s… it’s a long story. I’m so happy you’re going to be on board the Enterprise. I have great friends here, but not my Val.”

“I’m excited about it too, Ny. So it sounds like I’ll be seeing you soon, then?”

“Very soon! Much love, Val. Uhura out.”

The screen went black and Valerie sat back to think about what adventures might await her.


	2. Safety First

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Valerie must finally come face to face with Leonard McCoy, and is pleasantly surprised by his own interest in her, especially when he goes out of his way to visit her in Engineering.

And so, Lt. Valerie Maynard had been there for the entire dramatic mission to hunt down John Harrison…aka Khan. She’d been close by when Scotty had basically quit because of the weapons being loaded on the Enterprise. She’d done her best to assist Chekov as he came up to speed with running the Engineering Department. She didn’t take it hard that she’d been passed by for taking over as Chief—she knew she wasn’t as familiar with the workings of the Enterprise, and Kirk wasn’t as familiar with her as with Chekov.

When Scotty got back, however, and saw how she’d so competently assisted Chekov, he was pretty quick to promote her to Assistant Chief—a position he’d yet to fill because he hadn’t yet trusted any of the other Engineers enough to handle the position.

She’d gotten away with not reporting to sickbay because of the nature of the mission they were on, and the need for her in Engineering. But in the end, things finally settled down, and McCoy had saved Kirk’s life using Khan’s blood. It was pretty miraculous, and one day she hoped she would get to hear the story in full as she’d only gotten bits and pieces because most of the time she was trying to help keep the ship from falling apart. She even allowed her the smallest of hopes that perhaps it might be Leonard McCoy himself that she got to hear the story from.

Sure enough, things had quieted down and soon enough the repaired ship would be heading back out on mission—it wasn’t long before she’d gotten a notice on her PADD that she was to report to Sickbay as soon as possible for her shipboard physical.

Now, she sat on the end of a medical bed, feeling more nervous than she should for a physical. She was certain he’d probably have forgotten about her and their first encounter. A lot had happened, Academy, Nero, Khan, and so many other missions between those. Uhura was right, she’d had a crush on him from afar their entire time at Academy. She’d kept up with some of the reports of the Enterprise’s missions, paying particularly close attention to those that included her best friend, or her secret crush doctor.

And now, that Doctor was approaching, PADD in hand, paying more attention to it and her records than to her. “Let’s see, Lt. Valerie Maynard, Assistance Chief Engineer. In for your first shipboard yearly physical. Sorry we didn’t get you in before. Things have obviously been a bit hectic on board. Anything of concern we need to discuss?”

“No, Doctor. Feeling perfectly healthy.”

“I’m rather impressed with your record, Lieutenant. Most of Scotty’s crew end up in here with burns or cuts or something, himself included. You seem to be the only one never injured?” At that, he finally looked up at her. She noticed immediately that his eyes narrowed.

“I suppose I just take safety very seriously, Doctor.” She smiled politely, trying to ignore the intensity of his gaze.

“Well that’s a breath of fresh air coming from anyone on this crew,” he said in his normal grumpy tone that made her internally chuckle. “Do I—do I know you from somewhere else? I never forget a face, and you seem somehow familiar?”

She flinched a bit and looked away from him. “Wow, really—you must not ever forget a face. It’s been… six years? At least.”

“Six years? When did we meet?”

“We didn’t exactly meet. I was on the cadet shuttle that left Riverside Shipyard headed for the Academy. I sat across from you and the Captain.”

His eyes lit up in recognition. “That’s right! I remember now! You’re the one who laughed at my comment regarding my divorce.”

She held out her hands, much like she had that day, in a show of innocence. “I apologized then, and I do so again. I’m sorry, Doctor.”

The corner of his mouth quirked up into a smile. “It’s alright, darlin’—I suppose I would have laughed too, had I been on the outside looking in.”

She felt relieved. “Oh, I’m so glad to hear you say that. I’ve felt bad about it ever since then.”

“Really? Six years? My god, woman, if you felt that guilty, you could have looked me up at the Academy and cleared the air.”

“You seemed to be busy, between Academy classes and trying to keep the Captain out of trouble, you didn’t have time to bother with me.”

“On the contrary, I probably could have used the distraction from both said tasks. A beautiful woman with a good, intelligent, head on her shoulders would have been a nice change from the ones that Jim tried to throw at me. Your presence would have been a breath of fresh air.” She couldn’t help but blush at that. If he noticed, he didn’t say anything about it, but moved on. “But it’s all water under the bridge and now the air is cleared. Time to get back to business. I’m going to take a blood sample to run a gamut of tests—nothing to be worried about, just standard tests to check against your last recorded results. You’ll get a notification on your PADD when the results come in.”

****

A few days later McCoy was looking over the latest batch of lab results that had come through and noticed a now familiar name. Lt. Valerie Maynard. Everything looked good, but he suddenly had the desire to see Lt. Maynard again. Intrigued by the recollection of their first meeting, and her knowledge of his friendship with Jim, he looked a bit deeper into her records after her sickbay visit. Turned out she was not only a competent engineer, she was a ‘damn good one’ as Scotty had put into her record as a part of his recommendation for her being made Assistant Chief. There was even a special addendum from Chekov giving recognition for her assistance during the crisis with Khan. She really did seem to have a good head on her shoulders, and he’d gotten a pretty good look at her when she was in Sickbay and couldn’t deny that she was easy on the eyes. With that, he decided he’d pay her a visit in Engineering. He checked the duty roster and saw that she was on shift so he hopped up from his desk, PADD in hand, and headed out of sickbay.

When he arrived in engineering he quickly found Commander Scott. “Scotty, I was wondering if your Assistant Chief was around?”

“Val? Yeah, the lass is hanging around just down the way. Everything alright, doc?”

‘Bones’ filed away that the Lieutenant was called by ‘Val’—at least by Scotty. He wondered if others did the same, as they now called him Bones—the nickname that Jim had given him all those years ago. He once again thought about that being the first time he’d met Valerie. “Everything is fine, Commander. Just paying the Lieutenant a follow-up visit.”

Scotty’s eyebrow raised, but he shrugged. “Come on, I’ll show you the way. You’ll never find her otherwise.”

Leonard questioned Scotty’s judgment on his ability to find Lt. Maynard, of course he also questioned his own judgment as to why he was even doing this, but followed the Commander nonetheless. A few minutes later, several turns and stairwells later, he was glad Scotty had shown him the way. They arrived on a walkway rather high above the pipes and tanks that made up parts of the Enterprises’ engine systems. He took nothing more than a quick glance over the side before deciding he’d stay away from the side. Scotty pulled a small square from his pocket as McCoy watched. “What are you doing, Scotty?”

“It’s the only way to get her attention when she’s up there working. She keeps headphones on so she can listen to her music. Says it helps her focus on the job.”

“Up where?”

It was only then that Scotty nodded further up into the structure and McCoy almost had a heart attack right then and there as he saw the Lieutenant hanging from a series of ropes in the air.

“What in the blue blazes is she doing up there?”

“How did you imagine we access the pipes and systems up there when they need repairs and routine maintenance, Doc? Now, just give me a moment.” Scotty used what McCoy now realized was a small mirror and angled it just so that light bounced off and flashed into Valerie Maynard’s eyes.

She pulled off the headphones and looked down. “Yeah, Scotty, what’s up?”

“The Doc here was looking for you. I’ve got to get back to those bloody reports now or else I’m going to drown in them. Don’t do your normal stunts, lass, the Doc already looks as if he might have a heart attack from the sight of you up there in the harness.”

Even from down below, Bones could see the scowl on her face. “You and I both know, Scotty, that _I’m_ not the one who pulls the stunts on the cable system.” After Scotty walked away, waving her off as he did, she swung around so that she was in a sitting position looking at the Doctor. She was still about twenty or thirty feet higher than him and about the same distance away from the walkway into the middle of the drop that Bones was currently refusing to get close enough to estimate the distance of. “What can I do for you, Doctor?”

“I came to deliver your bloodwork results. Care to tell me what you’re doing hanging from the ceiling God knows how far up in the air? I thought you said you care about safety?”

“I do, that’s why I’m wearing a harness and all the proper safety equipment, Doc. I promise I’m doing everything by the book.”

Bones frowned and eyed the lines overhead, mumbling, “Still doesn’t seem safe.”

“Give me just a moment, Doctor,” she said before doing some work with the clamps that held her harness line in place. She tapped a button and soon was moving towards him, still high above. Once she was just over his head, she tapped another button and slowly lowered to the walkway. Once her feet were firmly planted on the ground, she released the clamp and it raised back into the air. It was only then that she frowned. “Now, Doctor, is there a problem with my blood work?”

“What?” he was still in a bit of shock from her movement on the cables. “Oh, no, no problem. Everything came back clear.”

She frowned again, this time in confusion. “I thought I’d receive my results by a message on my PADD?”

“I, um,” suddenly Leonard McCoy found himself fumbling. “I just thought I’d get some exercise and take a walk, deliver them personally, you know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cliffhanger, I know... but keep reading... I'm not leaving you hanging. :)


	3. Glutton for Punishment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Valerie teases McCoy... but he seems to enjoy it, so she decides to keep it up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short one, but it'll keep moving along. :)

Valerie wasn’t born yesterday, she knew that Starfleet Doctor’s didn’t deliver lab results in person on a starship, especially if they were normal, as McCoy had said they were. And his stumbling when trying to explain had been nothing if not… cute. She couldn’t believe it—he was showing an interest in her.

“Well, thank you, Doctor McCoy for the personal touch,” she said with a small smile as she walked past him back towards the way he’d come. “If you’ll excuse me, I need to put the harness back into the gear locker and sign off for the night.”

“Oh, yes, of course,” he said as he let her pass, though he then followed closely behind her. “If you don’t mind, I’ll follow you—don’t know if I could find my way back on my own through this maze.”

She smiled. “I guess it is a bit of a maze, isn’t it? I memorized the schematics of most of the fleet ships back in Academy, so I could make my way through the whole ship with my eyes closed, probably.”

“Again, doesn’t sound too safe.”

She snort-laughed, just like she had at him back on the cadet transport so long ago. “I didn’t say I was going to, just that I could if necessary.”

“Well, if power ever goes down and the lights go out, I’ll know who I want holding my hand,” he said in his normal dry tone. She stopped, and he quickly did the same, but she turned and raised her eyebrow at the remark. Only a moment later did he realize what he’d say and she saw a pink tint rise in his cheeks. “Bloody hell, woman, I didn’t mean _that_.”

“That’s a shame. Because I’d say if I had to pick who I’d want by my side if the power went down and the lights went out, it’d probably be you too, Doc.” She winked. Because if he was showing interest, she was ready to throw caution to the wind. He blushed again, and she grinned. “You are, after all, the Chief Medical Officer. It would come in handy to have someone with medical expertise as I’m sure health and well being would be a concern.”

“If I didn’t know better, Lieutenant, I’d say you were teasing me.”

She started back on her journey towards the storage locker with him following close behind. “You did start it. And I’ll remind you that it was you who came into my department to deliver a report that could have easily been sent to my PADD.”

“A glutton for punishment, I suppose.”

She glanced up as she unstrapped the harness and climbed out of it, noticing that he was trying not to watch, but glancing her way anyway. She then dropped it into the storage locker and shut it, locking it tight. “Well, if you’re up for some more punishment, then why don’t you join Scotty and I for drinks after shift? I assume you’re almost done with your own shift as well?”

He frowned. “Join you and—oh, no thank you, darlin’, I don’t like being the third wheel.”

Her eyes went wide. Did he think she was flirting with him but in a relationship with Scotty? “Third wheel? No, no, no—it’s nothing like that. Scotty, Uhura, Sulu, Chekov, some of the other bridge officers sometimes too, get together for drinks after shift sometimes.”

“Oh, I see.”

“It’s only just started recently, since everything went down with Khan. We all needed a bit of a pick me up after we thought we’d lost Captain Kirk. Supposedly, he might be joining us tonight. A bit of a celebration. You should join us. After all, you are the hero that saved the Captain.”

“I’ve saved Jim Kirk’s life more times than I can count, only this time it was a bit more literal than the others.”

She waved him off. “It’s alright, I understand if you don’t want to come. You’re a busy man and not interested in—”

“I’ll come. A drink sounds good right now.”

“Great. We meet in the Officer’s Lounge at 1900 hours.”


	4. A Stupid Accident

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim says it was a 'stupid accident' on the away mission, but whatever it was--it has severe implications for Lt. Valerie Maynard.

***Several Weeks Later***

Bones was in Sickbay organizing the latest shipment of supplies they’d received. Typically one of the nurses handled it, but he was anxious and keeping himself busy was the only thing even remotely taking his mind off of the woman who was now on her first away mission. It was a diplomatic away mission, but the aliens they were meeting with had mentioned some issues with their computer systems and Jim thought it would be a great opportunity to show them Starfleet’s dedication to friendly relations to assist, and would be a great opportunity for Lt. Maynard to ‘get her feet wet’ on her first away mission.

Even simple diplomatic missions could turn ugly, and with his budding relationship with Valerie, he felt even more nervous. They hadn’t talked about what was going on between them, hadn’t gone out on a date, but the looks, the banter with underlying flirtatious meanings—it had been going on for weeks and he hoped soon to get her to go for drinks with _just_ him instead of as a group with their crew mates.

He sighed, realizing that he wasn’t doing a great job of keeping his mind off of Valerie Maynard, when an announcement came over the comm. “Doctor McCoy, prepare for an injured crewmember from the away team. They’re beaming up now and will come directly to sickbay,” Uhura’s voice piped in, after a few moments, he assumed after receiving more information, she spoke over the comm. again, “Lt. Maynard has received a head injury of some sort, Doctor.” He heard how shaky her voice was. He’d learned over these weeks what close friends Valerie was with Uhura, as they had been since the Academy. No doubt the Communications Officer was worried.

McCoy’s heart dropped and his mind went frantic, he began pacing about, suddenly feeling as anxious as he had back in medical school. He stopped and cursed at himself before going to the nearby table and grabbing a tricorder and preparing the medbay nearest the doorway.

His worst fears became reality when Jim Kirk walked in carrying a limp Valerie Maynard in his arms. “Bones!” he shouted.

“Jim, what the hell happened!? Get her in here!” Bones yelled back and Jim quickly lay the limp body down on the bed.

“Everything was going fine with the mission, she fixed their systems and we were being given a tour of the local gardens. It was a stupid accident—she slipped and fell and knocked her head hard on a rock jutting out.

“Lifesigns are stable, thank God. But we need to get that wound cleaned up.” Nurse Greyson who McCoy hadn’t even noticed had been shadowing him the entire time, assisted him as he began cleaning the wound and healing it as best he could.

Scotty came running in at just that moment. McCoy had been concerned when he first became intrigued by Valerie Maynard that Scotty might have an attachment to her. But it had become clear rather quickly that it was more a brother-sister relationship than anything romantic. And now, the big brother was worried. “What the hell happened down there, Captain? You said it was going to be an easy diplomatic mission!”

“Calm down Scotty!” Jim said as he held the Engineer back from rushing to her side. “Let Bones do his work. She’s just knocked out, she slipped and fell and hit her head.”

“Hit it good too. We’re going to have to keep a careful eye on her for brain swelling. And there are any number of possible complications with this sort of injury.”

“Way to be positive, Bones,” Kirk said with a grunt as he stood, arms crossed, watching his Assistant Chief Engineer laying on the bed.

McCoy slammed his tricorder down on the table by the biobed. “Damn it, Jim, don’t you think I want to be positive about this?”

Jim’s eyes went wide. Bones had shared with him that he was interested in the Lieutenant, but he didn’t realize this had shaken him as badly as it had. He came over and rested a hand on his best friend’s shoulder. “She’ll be fine, Bones. She’s as stubborn as the rest of us. Too stubborn to die.”


	5. Bad News

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Valerie wakes up... very, very confused. And despite his own heartache, Bones is determined to help her.

McCoy was due to be off shift an hour later, but he remained, setting himself up in the medbay where Valerie lay. There was no telling how long she’d be out, but he wanted to be there when she woke up. He sat by her bed, scrolling through reports he’d been putting off reading. He wasn’t entirely focused on them, but he could at least say he’d attempted to read them.

“B-Bones?” She whispered out in a raspy voice.

He jumped up at the sound of her voice, dropping his PADD into the chair. “Val, you’re awake!”

“Wh-where am I?”

Bones frowned. “You’re in sickbay, darlin’. On the Enterprise. Do you remember what happened?”

She frowned as well, and her eyes darted back and forth. “Sickbay… Enterprise… I was… in a garden… I fell. Where was I?”

A feeling of dread started to overcome Bones. “You were on an away mission to Linax Seven. You repaired their computer system while the Captain met with their diplomats to begin negotiations for a treaty.”

“The Captain…” she mumbled, a look of fear suddenly coming over her. “I—I don’t remember that. I don’t remember any of that. I—oh my God… I—what am I doing here? I mean—” she squeezed her eyes shut and covered her face with her hands.

“Okay, okay—just slow down sweetheart. We’ll figure this out. One thing at a time. Do you remember my name?”

“You—you’re Bones? Right? It’s a strange name, but it’s the one I remember.”

“Do you remember my real name?” he asked cautiously.

She squeezed her eyes shut and he saw tears forming at the corners. “N-no,” she whined out. “I can’t.”

“Okay, that’s okay. It’s Leonard—Leonard McCoy.” His heart was breaking, but he knew he had to stay calm for her. He sat on the edge of the bed and gently pulled her hands away from her face. “We’ll figure this out together.”

“To-together…” she looked down where he held her hands. “Are we—together?”

He blushed. “No… no, we’re just—we’re just friends.”

“Oh. You called me darling, and sweetheart, and—”

“It’s—I’m from the south, it’s just something we do.” He tried to explain—he did often use the terms, but rarely anymore, and in this instance, for him at least, it meant more than just a colloquialism. But she didn’t need more information to process right now about them.

“Oh,” she seemed almost disappointed. “Okay.”

He heard the disappointment in her voice and though it felt so wrong to be happy she’d assumed they were in a relationship and was disappoitned they weren’t, he couldn’t help but derive some sense of happiness for that at least. But he shook that off, determined not to muddy the waters with his personal feelings. He squeezed her hands. “But we’re good friends. And I’m going to help you through this—not just because I’m your doctor. Because I’m your friend and I’m not going to let you go through this alone, you hear me?”

She gave a weak smile. “Okay. Thank you.”

“I think it’s safe to say you’re experiencing some amnesia, which isn’t altogether too surprising with the injury to your head. We’ll take this one step at a time and I’m sure before long you’ll remember what a pain in your butt I really am.”

She snort-laughed and a shot of hope went through his heart. He loved making her do that, it was her first reaction ever to him, back on that cadet transport, and occasionally he’d say something to make her have such a sudden feeling of humor or joy that she’d make the same response.

“Do you remember your own name?”

She considered a moment, then spoke slowly. “Valerie Renee Maynard.”

He smiled. “Very good. Do you remember how we met?”

She frowned as she tried to think harder. “We met…” she tilted her head to the side. “I—I’m not sure. Was it—school?”

“Sort of. Do you remember what Starfleet is?”

“Of course.”

“Do you remember going to Starfleet Academy?”

She frowned. “I remember leaving home, and—” She stopped, eyes darting back and forth before looking back up at him helplessly. “What have I forgotten about my life? Did I go to Starfleet Academy? Am I on a ship? What do I do here? How do I have a vague recollection of who you are, your nickname—but not your real name? How do I remember some little bits and pieces but not the whole?”

“Amnesia is a strange thing, darlin’. We’ll figure this out.” He sighed. He had to let Jim know what was going on. “For now, I need to go let the Captain know about your condition. He’s a good friend of both of ours. He’ll want to know you’re awake. I’ll be back in just a few minutes.”

He started to walk out and she called out to him. “Wait! You—please don’t leave me alone! I don’t know where I am, I don’t hardly know who I am. And I don’t know—anyone.”

“Okay, okay, just calm down, sweetheart.” He frowned a moment, then went over to a wall display and tapped a few buttons. “McCoy to Kirk. I need you down in sickbay immediately.”

“On my way, Bones.”

A few minutes later Nurse Greyson came in and Bones introduced her to Valerie—again. Thankfully Greyson had some of the best bedside manners of anyone in Sickbay and was very friendly and a few minutes of conversation was all that was needed for Valerie to relax around her. It was enough for him to be able to slip out when he heard the main doors of sickbay open and shut. He stepped into the main area just as Jim was looking around for him.

“Bones, what’s up?”

“She’s awake.”

“She is? That’s wonderful!”

“Not so wonderful,” Bones said with a frown and motioned Jim towards his office. They walked in and the door slid shut behind them.

“I don’t understand, Bones. She’s awake, that’s great.”

“I told you there were any number of possible complications from the head trauma she received in the fall. Well, she’s experiencing one of them.”

“What is it?”

“Amnesia.”

“Oh god, Bones—what has she forgotten?”

“Pretty much everything about the past six years. She remembers leaving home, but doesn’t remember going to Academy, nothing about the Enterprise. At least not that she can grasp at right now. Strangely enough, she remembered that I’m called ‘Bones’ but couldn’t remember my real name. Amnesia is a funny, tricky thing. There are things we can try to help her memories come back, but they may or may not work.”

“Well we have to try anything—everything. Whatever we can do—to help her.”

Bones frowned and his shoulders sagged. “I don’t know what to do Jim. It’s breakin’ my heart to see her like this.”

Jim came over, planted his hands on the desk, and leaned over towards his best friend. “What you are going to do is help her get through this, Bones. Not only because it’s your job, but because you care about her and it’s what you do for someone you care about.”

“Damn it man, I know that. I just mean—with the way things were developing between us, and now this. I want to help her however I can—it’s just so hard when she looks at me like she doesn’t really know me anymore.”

“She’ll get her memories back, Bones.” Jim said, putting a confident hand on his shoulder and squeezing. “We’ll do whatever we have to to make sure of it.”

Bones sighed. “Thanks, Jim. Now—would you like to see her?”

“Of course, perhaps seeing my charming handsome face will bring back her memories.”

‘Jim—” Bones said in a warning tone.

“Oh, come on Bones, you know I’m just teasing. Of course I want to see her, she’s come to be my friend, too.”

They walked into the private room where Nurse Greyson still stood by Valerie’s bed. The bed had been moved into a position so that she was sitting up and she smiled when Bones came back in the room, causing his heart to thump hard. When Jim came in behind him, her head cocked to the side as she worked to recall memories and she spoke up. “You—you are…” She scowled as she thought a moment. “Kirk.”

Jim smiled. “That’s right! I am! You remember me?”

She frowned again. “Just a name—like Bones. And sort of a feeling going along with it.”

“I hope it’s a good feeling.”

“Is Kirk your real name? Or a nickname like Bones?”

“No, Kirk is my name—my last name.” He approached her bedside and smiled. “It’s Captain James T. Kirk, of the Enterprise. Around here we’re often called by our rank and last name—but my friends call me Jim—and when off duty, that includes you.”

“Thank you… Jim. That—that is what I sensed—that you were a friend. But I didn’t want to presume that my feeling was right since right now I don’t know up from down.”

“Sounds like you can still count on your gut instincts, Val. You’ve always had good ones, and they’ve been a great asset to our crew more than a few times. What about Bones here—what’s your gut instict on him?”

She turned to look at Bones, and he couldn’t deny that he desperately wanted to know. “Friendship… but… different… trust… deep trust.” She shrugged. “I’m not exactly sure how to explain it.

“That’s alright. Still sounds like you’re on the money. Bones here is going to make sure you’re back in tip top shape and I’m sure between the two of you you’ll find a way to regain your memories. If you need anything, just let me know, okay, Val?”

She smiled and nodded. “Thank you… Jim.”


	6. Rest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Valerie gets to rest in her own quarters, and Bones has ideas on how to help her regain her memories.

Bones had stayed by Val’s side most of that evening, only leaving when Uhura had come after her shift to stay with her. Val had remembered her first name as well, and felt especially comfortable with her, which was good because it made Bones felt a little better about leaving to try and get some rest of his own. By the time she awoke the next morning, he was already back in sickbay and made regular visits by her bed, though Uhura spent most of the day with her as well, having gotten the day off thanks to Jim.

That night Bones walked by Valerie’s side as he escorted her back to her quarters. “Are you sure you feel up to staying in your quarters tonight? You’re welcome to stay in sickbay another night. A nurse and doctor are there at all times so you wouldn’t be alone.”

“If you say that physically I’m able, then I think I’d prefer a real bed. And you said that my vitals will continue to be monitored right—so if there was a problem, sickbay would know?”

“That’s correct.”

“I think I’ll be okay in my quarters, then.”

“If you need anything, even if it’s just a friend—don’t hesitate to use your communicator to contact me—okay?”

She smiled. “Thank you Leonard.”

He returned the smile at her use of his first name. “You’re very welcome, Val.”

“I know we talked about that gut feeling I’ve been getting when I meet people who I recall the names of. It really was different with you. I felt a deep sense of…trust. I can’t explain it exactly, but it was different from anyone else.”

“I’m glad to hear that you feel you can trust me. Because you can, Val. No question, no concern, nothing is too small—I want you to know you can come to me about any of it.”

They arrived at her doorway and she looked at it. “This is my room?”

He nodded. “Would you like me to come in with you?” She nodded. “Okay. Well, the door is keyed to your genetic signature, so when you step towards it, it will open for you. I’d have to use my emergency medical code to enter.”

She stepped towards the door and it opened. “Well, at least the ship knows who I am, even if I don’t.”

As they entered and she began looking around, he spoke. “I have some ideas for how to help with your memories. We can’t know for sure which one, if any, will work. Sometimes it just takes time, which I know isn’t what you want to hear. But, we at least have some things we can try.”

“Like what?” she asked as she examined her room carefully.

“Well, this is a start, seeing things that were important to you. The next would be reading over some of your personal log entries. You can access them from your PADD.” He glanced around the room and saw it sitting on a table by the couch. “There it is, right there. You can use voice commands with the computer to help you if you forget how to access it by touch.”

“Those seem like good ideas. I guess I can start with that before I go to bed tonight.”

“How are you feeling as you look around the room.”

She frowned. “It’s so strange. It feels familiar, but… it’s like I’m walking around a room that I’m familiar with but not because it’s my own. Just that I know it. I mean, it feels comfortable.” She shrugged. She slowly turned around again taking it all in before stopping and looking to Bones. “I suppose I should let you go now. I know you worked well over your shift time yesterday and today. Thank you, Leonard for taking care of me.”

“No problem. If you like, I can come check on you in the morning.”

She nodded. “I would like that.”

“We can discuss then how things go tonight with your room exploration and log reading and decide what the next step is. Sound good?”

“It does. Thank you again.”

“You’re very welcome, Val. Don’t forget—contact me if you need anything—no matter how silly it seems.”


	7. Confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "New" Valerie has some realizations after reading her personal logs, and decides to confront Leonard about her own feelings and see if her gut instinct about him (and his feelings) is right.

Bones had hardly been able to sleep and was up early to begin writing down some ideas he had for next steps for how to help Valerie regain her memories. Seeing more of her friends, going to Engineering, the officer’s lounge—all were a part of that plan. He also considered the use of the holodeck to recreate some locations that might help boost her recollection. He sat on his couch with a cup of coffee and his PADD when his communicator chimed.

“McCoy here.”

“Um, Doc—Doctor McCoy? Leonard? This is Valerie.”

He quickly sat forward. “Valerie. Is everything okay? I was going to come check on you in just a bit.”

“I, um—I was wondering if you could come to my quarters.”

“Of course, I’ll be right there.”

McCoy was already dressed for the day, and Kirk had worked with him and M’Benga to adjust the shift schedule so that he could spend his shift working specifically with Valerie Maynard on her amnesia problem, but he felt dressing in his normal uniform was still the most appropriate measure. He was still working, even if the goal was just as personal as it was work related.

A few minutes later he was at her door and tapped the chime. It took a few moments before the door slid open and she stood there, wearing casual clothing she must have found in her closet. “Thank you for coming, Leonard.”

“Of course,” he followed her as she stepped back into her quarters, taking notice that she wasn’t making eye contact. “How did you sleep?”

“It was difficult getting to sleep, but once I did, I slept well.”

“Any revelations after exploring your quarters more?”

“Only that I have a wide and varied taste in music that was quite shocking.”

Bones couldn’t help but chuckle. “I won’t argue with you there—I’ve heard some of your music—it is quite interesting.”

“I—I, um—I also read over some of my personal logs.”

“How did that go?”

“I felt as if I was violating someone’s privacy—but I kept telling myself it was my own privacy and I was allowed to read it.”

“Anything that helped?”

She frowned, but nodded. “Yes. I’m just not sure what to do about it.”

“What do you mean?”

She sighed and finally turned to look at him. “I thought that perhaps looking up what I’d written about the people I’d already met since waking up might be a place to start.”

Bones was starting to realize where this was going and nodded slowly. “I see.”

“So I specifically looked up logs where I wrote about you, Leonard.”

He was becoming more nervous now. “O-okay.”

“And because of that gut feeling I had about you when I woke up—that I can trust you. And because of the contents of my own log files—I want to be open and honest with you—because I feel so lost right now, Leonard—and I feel as if you are my one life line. If I can’t be honest with you, who can I be honest with?”

His eyes softened and he wanted to pull her into a hug, but restrained himself. “I—I want to be that person for you, Val. I want you to trust me, to be honest with me.”

She took a deep breath. “I thought so. You know, it’s interesting. Because of my memory loss, I feel as if I’m looking through new eyes. Even though it’s only been a day and a half. So as I read my logs, it was if I was seeing things through two different views. The old me—the one who experienced the past five years. And the new me, who woke up and began observing things without the biases I may have had from those five years of experiences.” She chewed at her lip, then suddenly shook herself of it. “I’m sorry, I should offer you a seat. Will you sit on the couch with me?”

He nodded and she motioned towards the couch. He sat first, then she joined him, sitting just a foot away and turned towards him. “So, lay it on me,” he said hesitantly, fearing the worst. “What did old five more years of experience you have to say about me?

She smiled softly at him. “Quite a bit, in fact.”

“Oh?” he said nervously.

“There are logs all the way back to when I first started Starfleet about you, Leonard. On my first day at Academy—I wrote about the doctor I sat across from on the cadet transport.”

“You laughed about my divorce,” he said with a smirk and a roll of the eyes.

She chuckled. “So I did! How terrible of me.”

“It’s alright, you apologized. And I told you later, just a few weeks ago when we first started talking—I didn’t blame you one bit.”

“I kept writing about you, all through my time at academy.”

He frowned. “But we never saw each other, never talked—”

“Oh, you may have never seen me, but I apparently occasionally saw you. Enough to keep my interest up. It made me very nervous when I came on board the Enterprise—knowing you were here.”

“I—I see.”

“And then I wrote about my physical, and our finally meeting again. And then you—you delivered my results personally. And I continue to mention you in logs at least once a week if not more for the past month and a half since then.” He swallowed and scratched at his neck nervously. She leaned forward and he glanced to see a slightly mischievous grin on her face. “Would you like to know what I said, Leonard?” she whispered in a conspiratorial tone.

“I—I’m not sure that I should. This all feels very… strange.”

“Imagine how I feel.” She paused and reached out, resting her hand on top of his that sat on his knee. “I’m taking a chance Leonard, because while old me only whistfully hoped for what your comments, your kindness, and your concern might mean…. New me… new me is quite convinced that her hope was true.” She slowly raised her hand and pulled his chin so that he faced her. “Leonard,” she whispered. “Do you have feelings for me?”

His nerves were about shot, and he jumped up and began pacing at her question. “This isn’t right. You’re—you’re in a mentally and emotionally compromised position. I shouldn’t be having this conversation with you right now.”

“Leonard—in this ‘mentally and emotionally compromised’ state that I’m in—do you understand how very little I am sure of?”

“That’s my point, darlin’—”

“No! Leonard—listen to me. I remember my parents, I remember my childhood, I remember tinkering with anything computerized or mechanical growing up. I remember acing all my classes in school, and I remember my parents being proud of me for something big. Then I remember leaving my home and that is where everything fades away. I can count on one hand the number of things I am sure of since that moment. You— _you_ Leonard are one of them. And I need you to answer me. Damn it, Bones, do you have feelings for me, or not?”

“Of course I do!” He yelled out as he turned and looked at her with tears in his eyes. “And my hearts been breaking from the moment they brought you into sickbay, and even more since you woke up and didn’t remember a thing about the past five weeks, much less five years. My insides are all torn up and the only thing I can think straight about is knowing that I have to help you find your memories, because I need to know that you know me.”

“Don’t you see, Leonard. At this moment, you’re all I know. When I read everything I’d written about you last night, that gut feeling I had about you became so clear. Because I care about you so deeply Leonard that it transcended whatever is going on in my brain. Whatever damage has been done, it couldn’t stop me from remembering how much I trust you, how sure I am of you, and of how much I care about you.” With her last words she had slowly, carefully approached and placed a hand gently over his heart. “What I need to know is—can you care about me for who I am today—the new me that doesn’t remember the past five years—or do I have to get those memories back in order for you to give me a chance.”

He couldn’t hold himself back any more. He reached out and pulled her into his embrace, kissing the top of her forehead, then her hair. “Of course I can—of course I do—yesterday, today—whatever happens. But darlin’—you can’t give up on remembering. It could happen. We have to try.”

She nodded into his chest and pulled back. “I’m not saying I don’t want to try, Leonard. But I need the confidence that no matter what, you’ll be there. That one day you won’t give up on me because the memories never come back.”

“Sweetheart, even stuck in this tin can, I’ve had five of the most enjoyable weeks of my life because you were there. You think I’m going to give up on you now? I never realized how boring and miserable my life was till you suddenly walked into it. I’m not going anywhere.”

He pulled her back towards him and held her close for several moments before she took a deep relieved breath and pulled back again. “Alright then. First, I’m starving. Second, will you give me a tour of the ship? Seems like as good a place to start as any.”

He smiled wide. “A tour it is—starting with the Mess Hall for breakfast, and we’ll go from there.”

****

“So, tell me a bit more about what you remember leading up to when you left for Starfleet Academy?”

He’d looked down at his food and when he heard her sigh, he looked back up with a concerned frown on his face. “What’s wrong?”

“Leonard—would it be terrible of me to ask if we can _not_ talk about my memories for just a little bit? I’m not trying to avoid thinking about them. But just for now, while we sit here at eat breakfast—can we talk about something else?”

He gave her a soft smile. “Of course, darlin’. I know I’ve been quizzin’ you non-stop. I’m sorry if I’m just a bit eager to find what it takes to unlock those memories.”

“I know,” she said with her own smile and reached out to squeeze his hand across the table. “And I’m ever so grateful that you are being so vigilant. I just—I know we’re going to be doing a lot today to try and see if something might work.”

“So then, what would you like to talk about.”

She smiled. “You.”

“Me? What about me?”

“Tell me about why a man who grumbles and despises space so much joined Starfleet. And not the one-liner you tell everyone else. Will you tell me about your divorce?”

“Oh, darlin’. I don’t know if you really wanna hear me go on about that, do you?”

She squeezed his hand again. “I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t want to know, Leonard. It’s an important part of your past.”

“Alright, well, where do I start…”

Twenty minutes later Bones had pretty much recounted the entire tale of his marriage and divorce, including skimming over the details about him finding her in bed with his former best friend.

“She took everything—my house, my car, pretty much the whole planet, and as I said before, all she left me with was my bones.”

Low and behold, as if right on queue, Val snort-laughed again. McCoy shook his head and gave her a glare of disbelief. “Really? Again? Why is it so funny to you that my ex-wife took everything?”

“It’s just the way you say it, Leonard. But come on, really now, you don’t actually believe that, do you?”

“Of course I believe it, sweetheart, I lived it!”

“But Leonard, she didn’t take _everything_ from you. Your incredible skill as a Doctor, your kindness and good heart—your grumpy hard exterior that you try to keep people away with.”

“Yeah, well, it didn’t work with you, did it?”

“I think It’s cute,” she said with a grin.

“Cute? That’s certainly one I haven’t heard before.”


	8. A Solution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A trip to engineering to try and help Valerie regain her memories leads to disaster, and just when she starts to lose hope--another member of the crew offers a solution.

“Oh, there’s my girl! The second best engineer on the Enterprise!” Scotty called out as he came over.

“Scotty?”

“You remember me?” he said with a joyous expression.

“I remember your name. I seem to recall names of those I was close to. I’m sorry I don’t remember much else.”

“Argh!” a yell rang out from nearby as one of the engineers cut his hand.

Bones rolled his eyes and ran over, looking at the wound. “Scotty, tell me you still have that medkit stashed here I ordered you to keep on hand?”

“Yeah, Doc—its’ right over here.” Scotty jogged over and grabbed the kit that was stowed away under his main desk.

As Bones began seeing to the injury, Scotty spoke with Valerie. “So, Lass—I wasn’t expecting to see you in here for quite some time.”

“Bones and I thought a tour of some familiar places around the ship might help me regain my memory.”

“Well, I’d be happy to show you around Engineering again, lass. It was your home away from home.”

“Leonard?” Val questioned the doctor.

Bones turned from his unexpected patient and gave her a questioning look. “It’s up to you. It won’t take me long here and I’ll catch up with you.”

She nodded then turned and smiled at Scotty. “Lead the way, Scotty.”

A few minutes later, Bones was packing the medkit back up when he heard a shout from somewhere overhead. “Bones! Get your arse up here quick!”

He had just snapped the medkit shut and grabbed it up, running up the stairs to the walkway overhead. It took him a minute to find where Scotty was knelt over Valerie, who was curled up in a ball sitting on the walkway. “What happened?” He ran up to her and knelt down beside her, rubbing his arm on her back. “I’m here sweetheart, what happened? You alright?”

“I—it’s so high…”

Leonard held her tight. “It’s alright, we’ll get you back down from here. Just keep your face turned to me and I’ll walk you down, okay, sweetheart?”

She nodded quickly and slowly stood with him. He held her close, her head buried in his chest, and took his time walking back down the walkway and out of engineering. Scotty was following close behind.

“Are you alright, lass? I’m so sorry—I never expected. Of all of us you were the least fearful of heights. It never occurred to me.”

Valerie took a deep shuddering breath and sniffed, wiping a stray tear from her eyes. “It’s not your fault, Scotty. I guess—I guess not having those memories has changed some things about what I am and am not comfortable with. Like heights.”

Leonard and Valerie said goodbye to Scotty but remained where they were in the hall. He had released his grip but now rested his hands on both her shoulders and bent to look her in the eye. “How you doing, darlin’?”

She shook her head. “I feel like I got hit by a torpedo.”

“Probably the crash after the adrenaline rush. Why don’t we take a walk to sickbay and let me do a few scans, just to be sure you’re alright? We should do a comparative scan of your brain today anyway, to make sure everything is continuing to go well.”

She nodded and allowed him to lead her, a hand at the small of her back, towards sickbay. A few minutes later he was looking over her brain scan results on a view screen in the private medbay where she sat on a bed. She slipped down from the bed and came to stand next to him, looking up at the images. “So, that one is before?” she said, pointing to the first image.

“Mmhmm, and this one was yesterday when they brought you in, and this one is today.”

“The one today looks more like the first one.”

“Exactly. The swelling is going down and everything is looking more normal. That’s a good thing.”

She sighed. “I know I should be happy about that, but I guess if something quirky showed up, I’d at least feel like we could point to it and say ‘that’s why I can’t remember’.”

He reached his arm around her shoulder and pulled her close. “We’ll figure this out. I promise.”

She leaned her head into him. “Thanks. I know we planned on a visit to the bridge, but—I’d really just like to go back to my quarters. Is that okay?”

“Of course it is. You’ve been through a lot. You should rest.”

“Will you walk me back? I’m sure you need to get back to work.”

“ _You_ are my only patient for the next few days, darlin’. Doctor M’Benga and I worked out schedules so that I can focus on helping you recover.”

She blushed a little and smiled. “That’s—that’s really nice of you, and him. Thank you, Leonard.”

“C’mon, let’s get you back to your room.”

*****

A little while later, Valerie lay curled up on one end of the couch in her quarters, a light blanket over her, as she took a nap. Leonard McCoy sat at the other end, PADD in hand, looking into any bit of research he could find on amnesia and how to resolve the memory loss. He heard a particularly deep sigh from beside him and looked over to see Valerie blink her eyes open and lift her own PADD up from where it had been laying beside her to read a little more of her log entries.

“You don’t have to do that, you know. If you need a break, you should take it. Let your mind rest.”

She sighed. “It’s the only thing I feel confidant that I can do right now. Besides, I just found an answer to a question I had.”

“Oh, what’s that?”

“I was wondering how I came to have that flask sitting up on the shelf.”

Bones looked to where she had pointed and his eyebrow raised. “I could have told you that.”

She smirked. “Yes, but why do I think your answer might have been tainted with a hint of bitterness?”

He sighed. “You won it, fair and square.”

“I don’t even know if I know how to play poker now.” She gazed at him a moment before speaking again. “Do you want it back?”

He shook his head. “Nah. I sort of like knowing you have it. If the end of the world comes around and I need that last drop of my prized Whiskey—I’d like to think I’ll be with you anyway when that day comes.”

She blushed and smiled, chuckling a little. “That was both really dark, and really sweet. I’ll take it.” She went back to her reading till a few minutes later his communicator chimed. He growled, but pulled it out anyway. “McCoy here.”

“Bones, it’s Jim. If you have some time with your current project, Spock and I have an idea we’d like to run past you. Can you come to the bridge?”

He looked over at Valerie and she shrugged, so he spoke into the communicator. “I’ll be there soon.”

After snapping the communicator shut, he turned back to her and she had an eyebrow raised. “Your current project?”

“Jim’s insensitive way at trying to maintain privacy regarding your situation.”

“Well, if that’s the case, I’ll let it pass. I appreciate his discretion.”

“Do you want to come? If it’s about you, you deserve to be there.”

“No, I think I’m going to stay in. I trust you.”

He smiled. “I’ll come back as soon as I can and let you know how things went.”

She nodded and was surprised when he stood, stepped over, and leaned down to kiss her forehead. Pleasantly surprised, but surprised. “Enjoy your rest,” he said as he hurried out of her quarters.

An hour later the door chime sounded and she pulled herself up off the couch to approach. Standing on the other side was a rather grumpy looking doctor she’d grown increasingly fond of, and none other than the Chief Science and First Officer, Commander Spock.

“Leonard, Commander—what can I do for you?”

“Spock here thinks he has a possible solution for your amnesia.”

She frowned at Leonard’s obvious dislike of whatever this solution was, but stepped aside and motioned for the two to come in. “You don’t seem too thrilled by whatever this idea is.”

“That’s because I don’t like the idea of the green-blooded—”

“Doctor McCoy, I have assured you that the probability of damage to the Lieutenant’s mind is insignificant, and when that probably is compared to the possibility of healing her mind and recovering her memories—it is a worth risk.”

“Damn it, you green-blooded, pointy-eared—” McCoy let out a growl. “ANY probability—any possibility of damage, is too great a chance.”

“Excuse me, gentlemen—but if you’d mind calming down long enough for me to hear whatever this option is, perhaps I could make the decision for myself.”

“I am perfectly calm, Lieutenant, I—” Spock began, but stopped when he saw the glare Valerie was shooting him. “I will stop speaking until you are prepared for me to explain the solution which I have presented to Doctor McCoy.”

Leonard sighed and turned to face her. “I brought him here because I knew you’d want to hear. Because you deserve to hear any possible solution. But I don’t have to like it.”

“I know, Leonard,” she said as she rested a gentle hand on his arm. “Thank you for bringing him here anyway.” Since both men were now quiet, she motioned towards the sitting area. “Well then, gentlemen, let’s have a seat.” Valerie moved to sit where she had been on one side of the couch, and Leonard returned to ‘his’ spot on the other side. Spock sat in one of two single chairs across from the couch. Once everyone was settled in, Valerie nodded towards Spock. “Go ahead, Commander. I’m listening.”

“I propose the use of a Vulcan mind-meld to assist you in recovering your memories.”

“Has such a thing ever been done before?”

“No, and it’s damn dangerous, and—” Leonard started in.

“Leonard!” Valerie spoke over him. “Please, let me hear what Spock has to say.”

“Sorry,” he grumbled and slumped back into the chair, thoroughly chastised.

“To my knowledge a mind-meld has never been used for such purposes. However, I believe that the link between our minds might enable me to assist in determining if the memories are lost, or just somehow locked away, in your mind. If not a solution, it might at least provide further answers.”

“Have you performed very many mind-melds, Commander?”

“I have enough qualified experience to safely perform the task, if that is what you are asking, Lieutenant.”

“It is. And, has that been with other Vulcans, or with humans as well?”

“Both.”

She nodded. “Have you ever experienced adverse side effects?”

“The most extreme of side-effects I have experienced are transference of emotions. Because, in essence, I will experience your memories alongside you, there is a possibility that I will feel what you felt in that time.”

Bones let a gruff chuckle escape. “You? Feel?”

“Bones,” Valerie growled.

“Doctor McCoy, as I have many times explained to you, and you have seen for yourself, I am not incapable of feeling, both because of my half-human side, and as a Vulcan. Vulcans are not incapable of feeling, we simply refuse to.”

Valerie took a deep breath and looked between the two men for a moment, then turned back to Spock. “Commander, would you mind giving me a few moments alone with Doctor McCoy to discuss your generous offer of assistance?”

“Of course, Lieutenant. I will wait outside for your decision.”

She stood and walked him to the door. Once he was outside, she turned back and looked at Leonard, still sitting, and quite definitely pouting, on the couch.

“You’re going to do it, aren’t you?” he grumbled, pouting even harder., even going so far as to cross his arms over his chest.

She approached, a soft look on her face, and knelt in front of him, placing her hands on his knees. “Leonard, I wish I could remember why you are so skeptical of Spock. But I have to believe that as First Officer, Science Officer, and a man of such intelligence and careful decision making, that he would not suggest this if he didn’t honestly feel like it had a chance.”

Leonard sighed and leaned forward, their faces inches apart from each other. “I know. And—I respect the man, I really do. But—” He sighed again. “Maybe I’m too emotionally compromised myself to make a good decision about this.”

“Well, it’s not yours to make, darlin’” She said, imitating his accent. That gained a small smirk at the side of his mouth. She raised her hand slowly and rested it on his cheek. “But it means so much to me that you’re so concerned for my safety.”

His head tilted forward and rested against hers. “I feel like I’ve only just found you, Val. I can’t lose you.”

“I’m too stubborn to die, Doctor McCoy,” she said with a grin.

It wasn’t lost on him that he’d heard those words from Jim about her just days before when she was rushed into Sickbay. He gazed into her eyes, his eyes lowering to her lips for only a brief second before going back to her eyes again. They were so close.

“Leonard?”

“Hmm?”

“Kiss me.”

His lips crashed into hers almost before she had finished the simple two word statement. Their kiss was brief, but it sealed a promise between them that no matter what happened, the connection between them had made it through everything she’d been through already—it would remain no matter what.

“Will you stay with me when he does the mind meld?”

“Are you kidding me? I’m not letting that pointy-eared hobgoblin get anywhere near you if I’m not by your side.”

Valerie rolled her eyes. “You know, for someone you respect, you certainly don’t call him very nice names.” She stood and walked back to the doorway, opening it and motioning for Spock to come back in. “Commander Spock, I have decided to consent to your mind-meld. However, I would like for Doctor McCoy to stay and monitor our progress in case anything unexpected occurs.”

When McCoy spoke, it was obvious he was doing his best to be congenial. “Can I at least request that we do this in sickbay so that I can use our equipment to monitor your vitals?”

“I am fine with that—Commander?”

Spock looked between McCoy and Maynard for a moment before nodding. “Very well.”


	9. Mind Melds Work

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Spock's mind-meld with Valerie, Leonard and Valerie are both relieved at the results and ready to celebrate.

When Spock suddenly stepped back from where he’d been bent over the medical bed where Valerie lay, both he and she let out a gasp.

“It… it is done,” Spock said, the exhaustion of the process hitting him hard.

McCoy took the few steps closer to Valerie and instinctively took her hand in his. “Darlin’—you are you feeling?”

Valerie blinked a few times, then looked down at where her and Leonard’s hands were linked, then up to him and smiled. “If power ever goes down and the lights go out, I know who I want holding my hand, Leonard McCoy.”

His face broke out in a wide grin. She was recalling one of their first conversations, when he’d brought her lab results to engineering. “You—you remember?”

She nodded, a tear rolling down her cheek.

“Everything?” he asked as his other hand went to her cheek to wipe away the tear.

“Everything,” she whispered.

Sickbay or not, he let go of protocol and leaned down to give her a quick, chaste kiss. When they stopped, he rested his forehead against hers a moment as he caught his breath. Then he stood straight and looked at Spock, tears threatening at the corner of his eyes. “I’ll never be able to thank you enough, Spock.”

Spoke seemed to clear his mind at that moment and turned to McCoy, nodding. “Thanks are not needed, Doctor McCoy. I am glad that the endeavor was successful and Lieutenant Maynard’s memories have returned.” He paused a moment, then looked between Valerie and Leonard. “I know that if Nyota was ever in need of medical assistance, you would do whatever was within your power to aid her, Doctor. I only wished to do the same.”

McCoy was speechless

Valerie sat up and turned, letting her legs hang off the edge of the bed. She gave Spock a knowing look. “I have a feeling I don’t need to tell you how grateful I am, Commander.”

Spock glanced between Valerie and Leonard a moment, then back to Valerie. “No, Lieutenant. I believe I understand. I must go now, I should complete my shift on the bridge. And Nyota insisted I let her know as soon as possible if my attempts were successful.”

McCoy caught him before he could go. “I can give you medical leave the rest of the day if needed, Spock. I’d say it’s well deserved, and I’m sure that mind meld takes a lot out of you.”

Spock took a moment to assess his own mental state. Being engulfed by the memories and emotions of Lt. Maynard had been rather overwhelming, particularly the last moments in which he very clearly felt and saw her care for the Doctor.

“I believe I will accept your offer, Doctor.”

Bones seemed particularly surprised that Spock had accepted. “Alright, I’ll write it up.”

“Before my medical leave begins, might I also offer to provide you with two days leave. I believe you and Lt. Maynard have much to discuss—and experience—together now that her memories have returned.”

Bones smiled sincerely. “Spock—I don’t know what to say.”

“A simple yes or no would suffice.”

Valerie rolled her eyes and slipped down off the bed to come stand by the doctor and look up at him expectantly.

“Val will still need a few more days to ensure she’s ready to return to duty. I don’t see how it could hurt to be able to spend that time with her—for observational purposes, of course.”

Spock’s eyebrow went up and an ever so tiny, almost imperceptible, smile edged at the corner of his lip. “Of course. I’ll see to it the order is put through. Thank you… Leonard.”

“And thank you, Spock.”

“Lieutenant Maynard, I will be sure Lt. Uhura knows of your well being.”

“Please tell her I’ll let her know when she can come by and visit.”

He nodded, the turned and walked out, Valerie looked up to see Bones having been left speechless. “I never thought I’d see the day where you two are getting along so well.”

“I was so happy when you told me you remembered everything, I could have kissed him.”

Valerie smirked. “Nyota might get jealous. How about you save those for me, hmm?”

Bones waggled his eyebrows. “That’s a deal, darlin’.” He turned and pulled her into his arms. “Now, how’s that head feeling with all those memories returned?”

“I feel… whole… again.”

“And how about this?” he asked, squeezing her. “How do the past few days of us connect to the past five weeks of us for you?”

“I told you, Leonard. Somehow, someway, the way I feel for you stayed despite all the memory loss. I think I fell a tiny bit for you all the way back on that cadet shuttle. You and your cranky, grumpy, ways. Now—everything just falls into place. I’m glad new me was bold enough to say and do what old me was a little too shy to do.”

“I can’t believe you had your eye on me through Academy.”

She gave him mischievous grin. “I did. What can I say—your dashing good looks and southern charm lured me in.”

He puffed up playfully. “Yes, well—it is hard to resist.”

She swatted him on the shoulder. “Why don’t you finish up here and put Spock’s medical leave through. I’ll meet you back at my quarters in an hour?”

“Sounds wonderful, darlin’. See you then.”

Bones couldn’t help but smile as he watched Valerie leave sickbay. It was amazing how much more confident she seemed now that she had those memories back. And he couldn’t believe he was lucky enough to have found her and have her in his life.


	10. Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A date and a visit to the bridge leaves Valerie thinking about the future.

Valerie was just looking through her closet when her communicator chimed. She flipped it open. “Maynard here.”

“I’m leaving Sickbay now. Thought I’d check in. How do you feel about a real first date?”

“With you?”

“No, with Spock. Who in blue blazes do you think I mean, woman?”

She couldn’t help but giggle. “It sounds wonderful. What are we going to do?”

“I thought I might keep that bit a surprise. But dress comfortable, it’s not like we have five-star dining on the ship, so we’ll keep it casual.”

“Sounds great. When should I expect you?”

“Should still only be about a half hour. Won’t take me too long to get changed.”

“Okay, see you then.”

With a wide grin she rummaged through her closet to find one of her favorite t-shirts and purple-died leather jacket. After finding her nice pair of jeans, she set about getting ready. Soon her hair was pulled back in a bun, she was dressed with black military style boots, her favorite to wear with her jeans, and just putting her leather jacket on when the door chimed.

With a smile she walked to the door and tapped to open it. The smile only got wider when she saw Leonard on the other side, also in jeans and boots, wearing a dark grey t-shirt.

“You look beautiful,” were the first words out of his mouth.

“It feels great to be in my clothes and really _feel_ like they’re my clothes again.”

“What does your shirt say?” he asked as he bobbed his head around trying to see it. She pulled back the jacket enough for him to read it. “The Mountains are Calling and I Must Go. John Muir” He smile. “You know I sometimes forget—you were born not too far from my own home state.”

She nodded. “That’s right. You’re from Georgia, I’m from North Carolina. We were practically neighbors. This is one of my favorite shirts I kept from back home. I loved the mountains.”

“You ready to go?”

“Yeah, let me just grab my communicator to slip in my jacket pocket in case.”

He waited by the door while she ran back in. “So, you’re still feeling well?”he called loud enough for her to hear.

“I’m feeling great,” she said as she came back to him, slipping the communicator into the pocket of her jacket. “I’ve been under the care of a great doctor.” She winked at him.

“Well, I hope you enjoyed it. Just because you’re feeling better doesn’t mean I’m going to stop caring about you.”

“I should certainly hope not. That was part of the deal, wasn’t it?” she asked as they began walking down the hall with him.

“Yes ma’am.”

They enjoyed a pleasant dinner together in the mess hall, though had several interruptions has people came up to say hello and tell her how happy they were she was doing better. Once they were done, as they walked out of the Mess Hall, Bones asked her about their next stop. “So—if you’re not too against it—there are a few people who have asked if we might stop by to see them.”

“Oh, whose that?”

“Pretty much the entire bridge crew. Jim is doing a double to cover for Spock, and Uhura, Sulu, and Chekov are still there. I told them you might not be up for it, but I promised I’d ask.”

She laughed. “Then I guess we’re making a trip to the bridge. Feels a little weird going there out of uniform.”

“It’ll be fine. We’ll be like tourists or something.”

Soon they were stepping out of the turbolift and Bones motioned for you to go ahead. “Ladies first.”

You stepped forward. “Permission to enter the bridge, Captain.”

Jim grinned and spun around in his chair. “Permission granted. You too, Bones!” He hopped up out of his chair. “Look at you! I can tell—you remember it all, don’t you? I can’t believe Spock’s mind voodoo did it! Did I ever tell you I’ve had a mind meld? With Spock Senior, when I first met him. Boy was that a trip.”

All the other bridge officers came over and hugged Valerie, giving her pats on the back and saying nice things about how relieved they were that she was back to good health and with all her memories in place. Pretty soon, Jim was trying to shoo them back off the bridge. “Alright you too, go enjoy your evening. I’ll be sure there are no major medical or engineering emergencies tonight.”

Bones snorted. “Right. Like you aren’t the one who usually causes all the major medical or engineering emergencies around here.”

“Well, I promise to be on my best behavior.”

“Captain, do you mind if we hang back for just a moment. The view is beautiful and I’d like to admire it for just a moment longer,” she said as she nodded towards the view screen showing the stars ahead of them on their warp journey.

Jim smiled. “Of course, Lieutenant,” he said as he grasped her shoulder and gave it a friendly squeeze for a moment. “But no thinking about work.”

She smiled again. “That’s a deal.”

After Jim had settled back into the Captain’s chair she took a deep breath and gazed out at the space ahead of them. She felt Leonard scoot closer to her side and place his arm around her waist to rest on her opposite hip. He leaned down and whispered. “What you thinkin’ about darlin’?”

She smiled. “The future, Leonard. If there’s one thing this has taught me, it’s not to take for granted every moment, ever memory. And I look out at those stars as I see the future.” She looked up at him, her smile directed towards him then. “ _Our_ future. Together.”

“That’s a future I look forward to.” He smiled back and they both turned to look back out at the stars again as the ship sped through space, taking them to their next journey, their next memory. Together.

THE END

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed. I have some ideas for what it would look like with Valerie in the picture during Star Trek: Beyond. Perhaps I'll create another story down the road for our favorite doctor and his new favorite engineer. :)


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